Posts tagged ‘Impotence’

January 13, 2019

Moments of Rare Delight

Delivering a profound spiritual message for humanity at…

Echoplex, 1154 Glendale Blvd, Los Angeles, CA 90026
Friday Jan 19th  8pm
w/ Flesh Eaters & Mud Honey

Space Cowboy Books, 61871 29 Palms Hwy, Joshua Tree, CA 92252
Saturday Jan 26th 3-4.30pm


Chevalier’s Books
, 126 N.Larchmont, Los Angeles CA 90004
Sunday Feb 3rd   5pm

 

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December 9, 2018

An Act of Great Treachery and Narcissism

Where egotism and self-loathing meet, where urgency merges with futility. Let me grace you with my absence…

November 15, 2018

Share the Selfishness

Available elsewhere, and from Amazon:

https://www.amazon.com/Hate-Poems-John-Tottenham/dp/1878923293/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1542304597&sr=8-1&keywords=the+hate+poems&dpID=41FfGSl2GOL&preST=_SY291_BO1,204,203,200_QL40_&dpSrc=srch

“In elegantly-wrought laments of self-loathing and mean-spirited love poems, the author finds that he has more to say on already exhausted subjects, and gives voice to the kind of thoughts most people prefer not to express but will nevertheless automatically relate to and be entertained by. Tottenham has staked out a singular terrain where egotism and self-loathing meet, where futility merges with urgency, and beauty is created out of bitterness. If nothing else, he furnishes proof that a poet maudit can still, if not thrive, at least survive, alive and unwell, in this benighted age.”
from the introduction, by Louis Pipe

November 6, 2018

Roasting Sparks

I will be throwing barbs at the Mael boys at this fun-filled event.

 

September 1, 2018

Say You Love Me

“I love you,” she says,
and my heart sinks.
Knowing what is required of me,
I attempt to reciprocate.
But it’s a struggle,
the words won’t take shape.
No other phrase is so hard to articulate;
no other sentiment is voiced so apprehensively.
I could be honest and say: I love you
but almost everything about you annoys me…
But somehow
those three precious, perilous syllables
are squeezed out, squeamishly:
“Isle… of you.”
It never sounds right when I say it,
but I say it
to put her at ease,
because what you get out of it,
temporarily,
is peace.

 

May 28, 2016

The Solution

Dried Up

I recognize the ideal,
of what I’m ideally working towards,
but I’m incapable of realizing it.
So why not satisfy myself
with what I imagine
I’m capable of doing
rather than actually doing it?
That seems like a reasonable solution.

But isn’t that what I’ve been doing all along:
basking instead of striving;
recognizing what I’m capable of
and settling for less?
Which is actually a long process
of resigning oneself to failure:
basking in the glory of potential
and potential glory,
until potential is dead.

February 23, 2015

Hooked on a Feeling

Vital Decline

I marvel at my feelings,
but I don’t trust them.
I’m dazzled by her,
but I don’t trust her either.
I’m not sure that she even likes me.
Which is fine, I don’t like her much either.

October 16, 2013

From Conduit to Cipher

Forfeiture
For too long a conduit I have been,
receptive only to the works of others.
In this way, in a way, I have kept myself
going; and were it not for the pleasure
and enrichment I receive at this font,
I might long ago have given up.
Then again, I might have
achieved something myself.

October 10, 2013

CXIII

Failure

There’s no point forcing it.
I’ve been forcing it for long enough:
going through the motions, motionlessly,
directionlessly, pleasurelessly. Attempting
is no longer tempting.  Other than to furnish myself
with further proof of incapacity, there doesn’t seem
to be much point in trying anymore.
Maybe I can give up after all.
I should never have doubted my ability
in that area.

 

 

June 15, 2013

A Prelude of Sorts

Impotence_0002

For years I have tarried, secure
in the notion that all this luxuriating
in vicarious decay served some sort of purpose. Until
it became apparent that this extended arid preamble
had turned terminal, squashing any prospect
of  fecundity. Fading without ever having flourished:
a dream unwinding,  grinding
to a standstill.