Posts tagged ‘Desolation’

March 16, 2021

Pilgrimage


Snow falls outside the hotel window,
floating carelessly through the air…
and I don’t care.
The town spreads out below me:
A sprawling red brick dream,
with white capped peaks beyond.
But I don’t respond.

Crushing boredom, grueling emptiness,
purifying alienation:
This is exactly what I came here for.
There is nothing more.

The snow brings silence with it,
sinking into the frozen darkness of a Sunday night.
On these tired, sour, leaden streets,
the bitter desolation is too much to take
for very long.  I return to my station:
stretched out on a bed,
gazing at a distant mountain range
or staring at a faucet in a trance.
It’s not refreshing, it doesn’t seem strange
and seductive, as it appeared in advance.

Far from the City of Refuge,
with no practical scheme,
constantly ruing the latest version
of what might have been; emptying myself
into the emptiness, negotiating the rush,
as a pick-up truck plows through the slush;
and I resign myself to another night, another day,
serving out a sentence.
I told myself I’d stay.

Outsiders here are quickly identified:
they’re clean-shaven.
I observe the bartender’s warmth
with other customers.
Surrounded by laughter,
I watch the bubbles in my beer,
shooting from the bottom of the glass
to a rapidly nearing surface, evenly spaced,
like asteroids in a primitive video game,
and leave unthanked.

On the street a creature is drawn to me:
a vicious black dog, grudgingly restrained
by an unapologetic owner.
These excursions strike me now,
as they always strike me at this point,
as being selfish and pointless.
What am I doing here?
When will I learn?
Despite all the goodwill I brought with me,
the place gave me nothing in return.

Advertisement
October 17, 2019

A Legacy-Defining Moment

New Emptyscapes up at Alias Books now through whenever.

3163 Glendale Blvd, LA CA 90039

December 30, 2018

Is there Life after Art?

One more week. Emptyscapes   Extended until 1/5/19.
Lora Schlesinger Gallery, Bergamot Station, 2525 Michigan Ave. B5b, Santa Monica CA 90404

 

October 24, 2018

Emptyscapes: Art Show

Lora Schlesinger Gallery
Bergamot Station, B5b: 2525 S.Michigan Ave, Santa Monica CA 90404

November 3 – December 15  2018
Opening reception: Nov 3rd 4-6pm

 

 

February 18, 2017

An Unoriginal Observation

wing

By the time one has learned how to live,
there isn’t much time left to profit
from what one has learned.

And it’s too late to still be learning,
too late to still be burning,
to come to terms with the past
by learning the easiest things last.

July 13, 2015

UNDIMINISHED

Acquired Waste

From now on I’m going to be a shadow
of my former shadow:
Living in the present, negligibly,
and regretting the past, sweepingly.
As for the future, I’m not sure if I have one.
But I’ve been saying that for a long time,
and I’m still here, even if I am
ten years behind my time.
Make that fifteen.

April 18, 2015

LIFE WITHOUT LIMITS

Imagining

I can feel time passing me by,
speeding up as I slow down,
creating the kind of deceptive, reflexive glory
that happens when the speed of the past
overtakes the slowed down present.

I was riding into the promise
of a life without limits,
infinitely rich with possibilities,
when the future suddenly turned into the past.
And looking back upon it,
it wasn’t hugely satisfying.

June 30, 2014

Emptyscapes – East Wall

Gallery.1.East Wall

June 5, 2014

Share the Selfishness

Show of new drawings.
Maloney Fine Art, 2680 S.La Cienega Blvd, Los Angeles, CA 90034. June 14 – July 3.
Opening Reception: Saturday June 14th, 6-8pm
totty_maloney flyer_web

 

February 21, 2014

A soft insidious plea

Self-Sabotage

If anyone’s interested in acquiring any of the drawings
featured on these pages, it can be done fairly painlessly
by contacting me at this address: otiosity@sbcglobal.net